Quick Stories from attending the "Holy War"

STORY #1
I attended the BYU vs. Utah college football game on Saturday November 19th, 2005 and it was a pretty good game overall. But this story takes place during halftime of the game when BYU was losing by 21 points and the fans were pissing their pants in anger.

I was sitting on the upper seats of the right stands of Lavell Edwards Stadium when I heard some loud talking between two men about three rows behind me. When I looked back to see what the two guys were talking about, a woman sitting close to them asked a dumb question. "Are you two brothers?" It was like watching a Bill Engvall "Here's Your Sign" joke come to life.
The more angry one of the two replied, "No, we're grandfathers" and then I kid you not, he flipped her off and called her a "bitch" and then used the word "fuck" in the next couple sentences.

It was one of the most funny things I've seen in a while and I couldn't believe something like that would happen on the BYU Campus. If you don't know about the school or the mormon religion then you wouldn't realize how rare this kind of thing is to see. Because it is certainly not tolerated there. That's one of the reasons I don't go to BYU for school.

Of course the woman and the fans sitting close by were pretty shocked and frustrated about what happened. They all started to torment the guy with "Don't do that, don't say that". The dumbest example of other spectators talking back was a father saying to the two guys, "I don't want my 14-year-old son sitting next to me to hear those kinds of words." I thought to myself, "Oh please, he's probably heard the words fuck and bitch about 200 times by the time he turned 14." The kid said it didn't bother him, no duh. This is 2005, not 1955.

Anyway, security took the two guys away for about 10 minutes and then they returned and nothing else really happened. The woman who got flipped off blamed the incident on people not sitting in their exact seats. I understand that because you get such little room on those ass hurting benches.

STORY #2
Earlier when the game started, some fans stood on a bench in front of my dad and I. And when they stood on it, we couldn't see the game. So my dad yelled at them very loudly. Since he doesn't yell that much, it sort of scared the begesus out of me. Then the guys got out of the way and put a motorcycle helmet and jacket down on the bench. I got so pissed at them that I wanted to grab the helmet, take it to the bathroom, and piss in it. I also wanted to throw the jacket towards the field and make the guy go get it. But I didn't do that stuff, I'm not stupid. So I just thought to myself. Stupid nerdy ass fucking dicks, sit the fuck down.